Does My Boyfriend Really Have No Clue About His Best Friend’s Crush on Me?

Disclaimer: The following story contains potentially distressing content regarding a sensitive situation. Please proceed with caution, especially if you are sensitive to challenging emotional topics.

Hey folks. I’ve got a situation and I, uhh, dunno how to put it all down. But I guess I just really need to vent or get some sorta advice? Here goes…

So me and my boyfriend, let’s call him Dan, have been together for like, 3 years now? It’s been awesome for the most part. We met in college, hit it off instantly. Both kinda introverted, love the same kinda music, same TV shows (big on The Office, and Stranger Things) — basically, a match made in Netflix heaven.

Now here’s where things get, well, weird. Dan has this childhood friend, “Alex”. They’ve been like brothers since they were kids. Always at each other’s houses, played on the same soccer teams, etc. When I first met Alex, he was super nice and all. Welcomed me into their little duo, and things were chill. But over the past year or so, things been, well… off.

Like, he’s been texting me more often. Random stuff, ya know? Memes, music suggestions, asking if I’ve seen this show or that movie. I didn’t think much of it at first. Friends share stuff, right? But then, he began to get a bit more… personal? Sharing problems, asking for advice about his love life, telling me about his day. At some point, it kinda felt like he was confiding in me more than he does with Dan.

There’s been a couple of times he’s asked to hang out, just us two. Said Dan was busy or whatever. And when we did, it felt, I dunno, weird? Like he’d compliment my outfit, or tell me my hair looked nice in this “new style” I tried. Even once, when we were watching a movie at his place, he kinda… tried to get close? Not like making a move but it was definitely not just “buddy” vibes. I brushed it off, thinking maybe I’m reading too much into it.

Dan doesn’t seem to see any of this. When I’ve subtly hinted at it, he’d laugh it off, saying Alex has always been the more “expressive” one. But it’s not just expressive, right? I’ve seen Alex sneak glances when he thinks I’m not looking. And, okay, this is super embarrassing, but once when I was over at Alex’s (yeah, without Dan, he was outta town), I kinda snooped around. I know, I know. Terrible. But I found this, um, journal. And some of the entries… kinda sounded like they were about me? Saying how he felt this “connection” with someone he shouldn’t. That he “dreamt” about us. I know, super freaky.

Guys, I feel so uncomfortable and guilty, like I’m betraying Dan somehow? But at the same time, I feel like he should know? Or should I confront Alex? I don’t wanna ruin their friendship but this is seriously eating me up inside.

Any advice? Has anyone gone through something like this? I’m super lost and I don’t know what to do. Thanks for taking the time to read this mess. 😟😣

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